Saturday, and bored!!?!

I have, at the mo', 9 bottles of Snapple Iced Teas sitting on my dining table.

The buzz-whir of the cabinet-maker's power drill makes it hard for me to concentrate on my story book. 2pm is an hour and fifteen minutes away, and then I have to send my mom for her appointment with the hairdresser. It's a tad hard to concentrate on the game I want to dig into with that little time to focus on it.

SpousieDude arrived safely in Abu Dhabi last night, and I was awake until 3am exchanging smusses with him.

At the mo', he's probably sitting in some conference room in a generic hotel, being bored out of his gourd attending the seminar/course his company sent him on. Me, I cancelled my 2pm lesson because of the renovation work going on in the house.

Truth to tell, it's provided me with a good excuse to laze :p

I'm feeling the year wind down again. Every year at this time, I'm usually either feeling maudlin, or pensive. It's a clear reflection on my feelings towards the year that's just passed, I know. I mean, most people look ahead. But every year, I look behind. So many mistakes, so many experiences. And I guess it's just a natural part of me to dwell on things that have affected me, whether directly, or indirectly.

My All-The-Reasons-To-Feel-Fucked-Up List

-I'm a mess.
-I've put on 2kg since Eid al'Fitr.
-I've stopped going to the gym.
-I take the lift up the two floors from the parking lot to my office every morning.
-I've been eating a lot.
-I'm feeling extremely lazy.
-I've got a bad case of acne.
-I've been scratching at it, to boot :p Not very pretty, those scars ;)
-I've yet to start practicing my piano.
-I just cashed in my cheque for November, and I already know what I'm going to spend it on.
-November's cheque might be the only payment I'll be getting for the rest of the year.
-SpousieDude doesn't know if he'll even be able to make it back home by Christmas.


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On the other hand, here's my Reasons-To-Feel-Chipper list.

-While it's been a chaotic year, at least I saved my marriage.
-I'm still employed!!!
-I've already bought my X'mas gifts.
-I'll be getting away from town for a weekend.
-SpousieDude may make it back for Christmas.
-I've got 4 REALLY CUTE kittens, and so fat they're about bursting out of their furry little skins.
-I can see my floor (yes, I tidied up my mess a bit).
-The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
-Good friends, Teapot Cafe, and scones.
-I had a Crambo Club Special from O'Brien's last night!!! (yes, feed ma' cravings!!!!)
-I know where to find Adobo!!!
-Shopping!
-New iPod (for SD, but I get to play with it first)
-Snapple!!!
-Sex!!

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Haha, okay, that last one isn't that important. But it's still fun!!! I actually had to wrack my brains thinking of enough stuff to fill my chipper list so it'd be longer than the downer one. But ya know, looking at it, YES. I've got lots to be chipper about. And I'm going to be able to find more interesting candy south of the Border to fill my gifts. So yeah. Joy to the world and all that.

I can't stand it. I wanna play the Sims (2). Guess mom'll have to find her own way to the hairdresser *cackle*....

Maudlin. Rocks A-Head.

Wow, the year's winding down, the old is on its way out. The new... well, lets say the new is waiting at the doorway, and it's up to me to usher it in.

Such a polite person, this New.

Anyways. I'm taking a breather. Heck! It may even be a permanent air-pocket in the stuffy area that is my life. The old year has seen a lot of students going on break. The new year may not see them again, depending on time. Theirs and mine. Also on whether I've been doing a satisfactory job so far.

Faugh. What a thing to worry my fat head over. It'll happen when it happens. At least SpousieDude is now earning enough that we're comfortable even if I never worked another day in my life. NOT that I plan on leeching. Nah, what do you take me for? I'm lazy! Not useless!!! :p

Anyway, musically, 2005 has been...a revelation. But I'm not that bright, so I'm easily impressed :) I've learned that there's still a LONG way for me to go. So many gaps in my education. And yes, I realize I'm the one who put those gaps there.

Also, I'm very much aware now just how common I am. In the sea of musicians, I am but a minnow. Are minnows salt water fish? Cuz if they're not, then I am an ikan bilis. What's that in Common again? ;)

I do believe I'm rambling.

Here's a thought. I'm getting older. And I'm feeling the changes that ageing brings. And I'm not talking about the physical problems, although those are starting to make themselves felt. The hours I keep. My energy levels. My enthusiasm for anything new.

I'm a stodgy old fart, and that fact is hitting me hard!!!

I guess having too much time to ponder my life is making me maudlin. I mean, I'm 28. And next year I'll be 29. And then I'll be 30. And I'm still living with my parents (although it's great, cuz SpousieDude isn't around). My kid's going to Primary School once the school year re-opens. I hardly see my husband, and now I hardly hear from him as well.

And of course, the rainy season is here. I love it. Honest. But it's wet, and just a little dreary.

I'm looking forward to Christmas. I'm looking forward to SD coming home. I'm looking forward to singing in Singapore with the WP. I'm looking forward to the performance at KLPAC with the Phil. I'm looking forward (but not all that much, cuz I hate my piano playing skills) to the gigs with WM.

And I'm looking forward to the brief lull the office is going to have, before we swing full-time into the Cammies.

I'm going to bed. God knows, I'm so darned tired.